Ugly Duck-kitt

So I missed the first episode of the new Knight Rider. Most probably it was the 2 hour pilot which was all over the web right after its NBC telecast in the US. A decent looking Kitt and a stylish attack mode made the pilot quite digestible. So in order to catch the first season episode I set the timer on the TV to 10pm , Friday, Star World. I knew what was coming. From the first season opener, they had turned the Kitt into a monster. Not a compliment. In the attack mode t indeed looked like an ugly monster.

The style of the pilot episode car was replaced by rice boy creativity. A cross between a drag racer and a dump truck, that's what the upgraded attack mode was. They took a good looking car and turned it into a heap of scrap. The supercharger on the hood looks more like a trio of PVC pipes glued together than of anything to boost the power. The side scoops look atrociously ugly. Who designed this thing? Drag racer ambitions translates into rubber band profile front tyres and dough nut wannabe rear tyres. To finish off - a spoiler which goes all the way upto the heavens with no purpose but to make the car look garish. And what's with the neon lights? The neon glow looks so cheap and down grade. It's a car for god's sake, not a diner from the 80's.

The transformation scenes look good though. Not of Transformers league, but close. It's an entirely different matter that I just hate what it transforms into.

If by any chance you liked the car in the image, the credit goes to the photographer. He must have had a tough job finding a less disturbing angle.

US Air Force to rear studs...Ford Mustangs to begin with

The US Air Force is at it again. No, they didn't bomb an entire village in Afghanistan to kill a single terrorist. And they haven't admitted that they have a flying saucer in one of their hangars in the Nevada desert. Instead they have drafted in Galpin Autosports, a tuner company to make this - a special edition Ford Mustang.

Apltly named US Air Force Mustang X-1, this car is wider than the standard Mustang. With a heavily altred front section which reminds you of the new Knight Rider it is indeed a loud car. They say it has been designed with fighter jet design as source material. I'll take that with a pinch of salt. Power figures are way north of 500bhp and the nitrous adds to the surge. The tyres are so wide that you'd wish you are never run over by this one. Finished in white (an unusual choice), this one has all black rims, scissor doors which would make a Lamborghini proud and an ejector seat. Yeah, you read it right - an ejector seat. That does makes it outrageous. It's a single seater and the driver sits in the middle. Very much like a fighter jet. The interior wouldn't be quite new to the seasoned fighter pilot as well. Did I mention that it has a shifter borrowed from a fighter jet? I'd be surprised if it doesn't have the storage area for the warheads.

So what is this machine for? Why exactly would the Air Force need a car like this when they have Raptors, Eagles and Stealths as pin-ups? Short answer. The car will be part of the recruiting programme. Uncle Sam has aged and what the armed forces need to get the attention of the youngsters is the all American muscle car phenomenon. And it always works.

Don't dare to ask too many questions unless you have atleast a hundred anti-aircraft missiles in your backyard. Everything is on a need to know basis and you don't need to know.

P.S - This isn't the only machine which is part of the recruitment drive. A Stealth inspired Challenger is also drafted in. More on that in a later post. Statutory Warning: It is scarier than this one.

Knight Rider drives into Indian TV screens

Think of David Hassellhoff and the first things that come to your mind will be one of these two - Baywatch or Knight Rider. The result depends a lot on whether you are a babe guy or a car guy. Let's pay attention to Knight Rider as it's the one which belongs in this blog. The 1980s TV series on a crime-fighting duo - Michael Knight (David Hassellhoff) and his sentient talking car (KITT), was an instant hit. So much so that it has witnessed reruns on channels around the globe. A total of three TV movies and a spin-off series (Team Knight Rider) followed suit. In India, DD picked it up quite early and later Star World took over the wheel. As producer Glen. A. Larson envisioned, Knight Rider was about a modern day knight who fought crime. It was more like a western with a cow boy-like protagonist as far as charm and attitude are concerned and a hi-tech car instead of a spirited horse.

In 2008 NBC resurrected the franchise with a new cast and more tech-laden concept. David Hassellhoff was replaced by soap opera pretty boy Justin Bruening and the iconic Pontiac Trans Am, justifiably was replaced by a new Ford Shelby GT 500 KR Mustang. Bruening played Mike Traceur, son of Michael Knight. The 2 hour pilot episode garnered enough rating to approve a full-fledged season. Though purists did complain about the missing charm of the old series, the lacklustre performances by the actors and of course the selection of Val Kilmer (Batman Forever, Top Gun) over William Daniels as Kitt's voice, the makers and NBC launched the new series in September 2008.

Despite the abundant use of special effects and the move to make KITT more sophisticated than a Transformers robot, the series does lack the simplicity and fails to keep the attention of the viewer. Kitt has a new-look super pursuit mode which I must say often makes it look uglier than the cars featured in BBC Topgear Carbage section. It's absolute garbage.
The new Kitt borrows a lot from the Transformers movie with its instant transformation tricks as it shape shifts to other Ford vehicles. Over-the-top product placement from Ford. Unlike the good old Kitt, the new machine is a weapons specialist. Guns, missiles, EMP, laser, everything that will feel at home in a Star Trek battle ship, lurks under its panels. The signature Turbo-boost which launches the car to a short leap over hurdles is back too. But the scenes are nowhere near the ones from the original series which stunned you with the realism. The base got bigger too as now Kitt relaxes at Kitt-cave, a rip-off of Bat-cave and a specially designed cargo plane instead of the trailer truck does the pick-up and drop duties.

Seriously, I never wished any of this to happen. I am probably one of the biggest fans of the original series and I'd love to see Hoff and Kitt with their buddy talks, hi-speed runs and the final drive, to the sunset with that brilliant theme score in the backdrop. Knight Rider is out of place in this age. Regardless of all the tech, transformation and the espionage acts the new edition fails to deliver and fails to match the adorability of the real cast, crew and themes. It's one of those series which belong in that age. It shouldn't be fiddled with, but has to enjoyed in all its original glory.

The new Knight Rider airs on Star World from June 18. The one hour show will be telecast every Thursday and Friday at 10 pm.